gratitude

is it just me or is it really easy to complain? i mean isn't easier to come up with reasons why things aren't perfect, why things could be better, why what we have is ok, but if we could have (fill in more expensive, flashy, fulfilling item here) then we wouldn't need another one... the funny thing is, even though i'm thinking about gratitude, i'm thinking about being grateful for what i had when i get it back rather than all the things i have now... i'll explain

as most of you know, a week ago i fell down the stairs in my condo... it was a trip or mis-step... something about our stairs caused me to fall... and i broke my ankle. well for those of you who have never broken an ankle, lets just say that it wasn't fun. all the while i was rolling on the floor at the bottom of the stairs, i kept trying to tell my family i was alright, i was fine, not to worry, but the problem was it hurt so d@#n bad that i couldn't get those words out... anyway, 6 or so hours later i was back from the emergency (now there's an oxymoron) room and had a splint and a broken ankle... word of advice, if you're going to break your ankle, make sure it's your left one or you're in serious trouble... i however broke my right, ergo, no walking and no driving! the first thing that you notice about crutches is that unless you are a master of the iron cross, they're not very helpful and not very comfortable... they are however, essential to your efficient movement, but that comes later... in the beginning you notice that the slightest pressure on your underarm and you want to collapse to the floor, like Spock using the Vulcan death grip... but after awhile the pain is just another dull sensation that takes turns grabbing your attention when your broken ankle isn't... ah yes, then, in an effort to be safer and remain mobile, you begin to crawl around the house, holding your ankle up behind you... yes, it is as graceful and dignified as it sounds... in fact you realize that this is even a step backward for your 2 year old, who has come to enjoy your company as you both slide down the stairs on your bum... "bum, bum, bum" and so it goes... of course the relief here is short lived because the body has a wonderful way of letting you know when you're overusing a particular part... it's called pain... so now, when you collapse from your aching pits you land on your raw knees and you look like you're in a struggle with some invisible force from Harry Potter, only to submit and go into the ever distinguished fetal position.... but i digress... i'll save you the drama, but lets just say that the palms of your hands, from holding the crutches, fair no better... nor does your good foot that must hop you around like a one legged kangaroo (think foot cramp) or your aforementioned bum that finds itself in the seated position for 90% of your day....

so yes, gratitude is what i was thinking of... but to explain my earlier thought, what i meant was is this: i'm thinking how grateful i am that unlike some, i actually can walk and run and that when i get that mobility back i will be so grateful!!!
but that's not the point you say, and here is where i agree.... i can be grateful, right now and in this state, that i have such a loving family that takes care of me in this trying time, grateful i can see, and hear and move and rest, grateful that i have friends, and an education and the hope of good employment, grateful i have a Faith and a home and a shower and food in the fridge even though i can't get there without dragging my 36 year old body across the floor like a wounded soldier in DaNang.... ooops... well, you get the point... grateful, for what we have....